a shudder of cold fear. The following morning I could hardly drag myself to Lahiri Mahasaya’s home.
“‘Sir, I am ailing again.’
“My guru’s glance was quizzical. ‘So! Once more you indispose yourself.’
“‘Gurudeva, I realize now that day by day you have been ridiculing me.’ My patience was exhausted. ‘I don’t understand why you disbelieve my truthful reports.’
“‘Really, it has been your thoughts that have made you feel
a shudder of cold fear. The following morning I could hardly drag myself to Lahiri Mahasaya’s home.
“‘Sir, I am ailing again.’
“My guru’s glance was quizzical. ‘So! Once more you indispose yourself.’
“‘Gurudeva, I realize now that day by day you have been ridiculing me.’ My patience was exhausted. ‘I don’t understand why you disbelieve my truthful reports.’
“‘Really, it has been your thoughts that have made you feel
